One thing I distinctly remember from being pregnant with Katie Anne is the vivid, crazy dreams that I had. This pregnancy has been no different: every time I wake up (which is often... sigh), I wake up in the middle of some crazy dream that seems so real that it's hard to realize I'm still in my room! Last night, I had four crazy dreams that all seem related to the new baby. If my grandmother Nana were still alive, I'm sure she'd know exactly what each of these dreams mean because she loved to try to tell you what your dreams meant. But, since she isn't, I thought I'd blog about them and see what you all think they're all about - and because some of you are in them!
Dream 1: I dreamed about the baby itself for the first time. (It was a healthy baby boy, by the way.) When I was in the hospital, Saunders and my mom told me to go on home with the baby and they would pack up everything and bring it home. Well, a few days after we got home, I asked Saunders how much the baby weighed when he was born. He said, "Um, I don't remember." I asked my mom, and she didn't remember either - so I asked for the card off the basinette from the hospital. Turns out, they'd forgotten it... along with everything else from the hospital! They left everything in the hospital room, including my camera! I was FURIOUS. I called Kennestone, but they said they'd thrown everything I'd left in the room away. Then, I was just totally depressed.
Interpretation: This one's pretty easy to figure out. I greatly fear losing control. All of the things related to the baby's birth are important to me, and I really fear losing those things, pictures, etc. Obviously, this would never happen - my mom would rather leave her own right arm at the hospital before she'd leave my camera behind, and Saunders knows I would destroy him if he didn't bring home every little relic of the baby's birth from the hospital. However, I'd recently got some very scary budget news about work - including that my entire maternity leave may be unpaid - and I think that I'm really worried about not being as in control of this maternity leave preparation as I was last time. I don't even know what grade I'll be teaching next year, I don't know what day school will start, I don't know if I'll be furloughed during pre-planning, I don't know if I'll be paid during my leave... all this uncertainty is obviously making my subconscious very nervous!
Dream 2: I dreamed Saunders and I ran a boarding house - not in our current house. It was very big, institutional, and white. Today, Katie Anne and I were supposed to wake up someone who was living in the basement - it was actually a guy named Chris Meadows that I graduated high school with - at a certain time. We went in his room to tell him to get up, and he started freaking out because it was way later than when he'd told me to wake him up. When I realized what time it actually was, I realized that I'd missed my OBGYN appointment that I'd had scheduled. (I really do have one scheduled for today.) I started freaking out that I'd missed it.
Interpretation: I don't know. Maybe a fear of not getting everything done or not taking care of my responsibilities? Maybe I'm worried about forgetting things.
Dream 3: I was trying to get Katie Anne to swim practice at her old teacher Mrs. Tonya's house, but I didn't have a car. So, I put us both on my old bike and pedaled us there. It was very cold, foggy weather. When we arrived, Mrs. Tonya pointed out that I'd forgotten Katie Anne's swimsuit, so we had to pedal back home to get it. When I got home, Erin Jolly was there. She offered to drive us back to swim practice (in her old silver Civic that she sold several years ago), but she didn't have a real car seat - only Ella's infant base was in her car. But, Erin told me that she had a life jacket that we could use as a restraint. So, I put Katie Anne in the life jacket and wove my seat belt through it. We decided that Erin had to drive really carefully so we didn't get into trouble. Well, Erin ran a red light in the fog (crazily, the one right beside my school), and we got pulled over by the police in the parking lot of my school. The police officer was not impressed with the improvised life jacket car seat, and I got arrested. Sitting on the curb in the parking lot waiting with Erin and Katie Anne for the police officer to decide what to do was SO real.
Interpretation: I don't know. This was weird! Obviously, forgetting stuff was a theme again.
Dream 4: I was trying to get Katie Anne - who was her current self - ready for school, but all the clothes in her closet were her old baby clothes. All of them were 6-12 months clothes. I kept trying to put on those little onesie/dress front things I loved to dress her in when she was little. Of course, they didn't fit - I knew they wouldn't, but I kept trying them anyway. Katie Anne kept saying, "Mommy, this is too little! I'm too big for this!" and I kept telling her, "I know, but I don't have anything else for you to wear!"
Interpretation: I don't know. Trying to keep KA from growing up by putting her in baby clothes? Afraid the baby stuff will take over and I won't have anything for KA?
What do you think about all these crazy dreams!? And, I better get off the computer and go... so I won't be late for that OBGYN appointment since I'm obviously worried about it!